Integrity Goes Beyond Honesty

Honesty is telling the truth — in other words, conforming our words to reality.

Integrity is conforming reality to our words — in other words, keeping promises and fulfilling expectations.

This requires an integrated character, a oneness, primarily with self but also with life.

Let’s get practical

One of the most important ways to manifest inregrity is to be loyal to those who are not present. In doing so, we build the trust of those who are present. When you defend those who are absent, you retain the trust of those present.

Outtakes from Stephen Covey’s book – The 7 habits of highly effective people

Thank You

Von Dave und TanjaIt is not easy to say goodbye. Some of our relationships have developed over 20 years. We know it’s not the end, but to let go is hard. Sometimes we cry because it hurts so much.

We know, that deep relationships will stay the distance and endure over time. But we also know, that we need to make new friends. This is also a part of the process of letting go.

Our friends here will always have a place in our heart.

We wish to stay in contact and look forward to a visit in the coming years.

Thank you for all the good and challenging times we had with you.

My New Team


These are the people that will join me to Cambodia. I am very exited and thankful to have such great people come along. Most will stay for at least one year. This will give us the opportunity to put together a fun Khmer class.
The plan is to work out a strategy for the coming years.
How do we want to start the NGO?
How do we build the church?
What are the greatest needs and how can we meet them in the long run?

Looking forward to a fun time.

Helping Friends

Cambodia talk

Blog auf Deutsch.

3 things about helping a friend in need.

1. Honesty

Honesty is speaking truth and creating trust in minds of others.

If you are honest when helping a friend you will create a save space for them to be open up and trust that your advice will be true.

Almost any difficulty will move in the face of honesty. When I am honest I never feel stupid. And when I am honest I am automatically humble. Hugh Prather

Kings take pleasure in honest lips; they value a man who speaks the truth. Proverbs 16,13

A key word is confrontation!Don’t try to win them, by deceiving honesty. Honesty means: “I love you so much, I will confront you with the truth.” Even if you are not 100% sure. It’s not a crime to change your mind – as long as you are honest about it.

2. Advisers

An Adviser is someone who is giving advice.

You can’t solve all problems! Stay open to include advise from other people and friends.

Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed. Proverbs 15,22

Wise men don’t need advice. Fools won’t take it. Benjamin Franklin

3. Listening

A Listener is someone who listens, especially to a speech

Listen with more than just your ears. Your friend may tell you something he can’t say with words.

The first duty of love is to listen. Paul Tillich

Nonverbal Communication

  • My body is facing you
  • I am looking at you
  • I can feel your pain
  • I hear more than you are saying

Asking questions is a very effective way of active listening. Know that words are only the tip of the Iceberg.

Everybody needs a friend that will help when times are dark. I am thankful for my friends that have carried me trough those tough times.

Sometimes we don’t know how to help. Than it is so good to know that God knows. It’s in moments like these, when we are praying with the right motivation.

May you be the best friend to your friends!

Related posts
Who Are Your Facebook Friends?
The 2am Friend 

What Is A Disciple?

Blog auf Deutsch.

What does it mean to be a disciple of Jesus?
As you will discover, the answer is fairly simple, but it changes your life completely. The word disciple refers to a student or apprentice. Disciples in Jesus s day would follow their rabbi (which means teacher) wherever he went, learning from the rabbi’s teaching and being trained to do as the rabbi did.

Basically, a disciple is a follower, but only if we take the term follower literally. Becoming a disciple of Jesus is as simple as obeying His call to follow. When Jesus called His first disciples, they may not have understood where Jesus would take them or the impact it would have on their lives, but they knew what it meant to follow.

They took Jesus’s call literally and began going everywhere He went and doing everything He did.

It’s impossible to be a disciple or a follower of someone and not end up like that person.

Jesus said, “A disciple is not above his teacher, but everyone when he is fully trained will be like his teacher” (Luke 6:40). That’s the whole point of being a disciple of Jesus: we imitate Him, carry on His ministry, and become like Him in the process. Yet somehow many have come to believe that a person can be a “Christian” without being like Christ.

A “follower” who doesn’t follow. How does that make any sense?

Many people in the church have decided to take on the name of Christ and nothing else. This would be like Jesus walking up to those first disciples and saying. Hey, would you guys mind identifying yourselves with Me in some way? Don’t worry, I don’t actually care if you do anything I do or change your lifestyle at all. I’m just looking for people who are willing to say they believe in Me and call themselves Christians.

Seriously?

No one can really believe that this is all it means to be a Christian. But then why do so many people live this way? It appears that we’ve lost sight of what it means to be a follower of Jesus.

The concept of being a disciple isn’t difficult to understand, but it affects everything.

I only follow people I love. I love Jesus!

Questions

Up to this point in your life, would you call yourself a follower of Jesus Christ?
Why do you say that?
Do you see evidence of your faith as described in Luke 6:40?

Inspired from the book Multiply by Francis Chan

You Can Be A Hero

Blog auf Deutsch.

It was a special day giving clothes to families in need. It was the second time we did this during our vacation. In the past we have spent our holidays to please ONLY ourselves. Since the last years we have always planed in some time to give away time/energy or gifts during our vacation.

We have always came relaxed out of our vacation.
Now we come home relaxed and fulfilled.

Here are some more photos of that day we spent in the slums Viagra Online of Phnom Penh.

My Ebook On iTunes Bookstore

This book is available for download on your iPad or on your computer with iTunes.

Download from iTunes for FREE click here.

Love Is A Verb

Blog auf Deutsch.

Like a mother loves her child. Love is unconditional. Love is given!

Boat Trip 1405The problem with negative thinking is that it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. People become reinforced in the direction they are determined, and they produce evidence to support the belief. They feel increasingly victimized and out of control, not in charge of their life or destiny.

They blame others or circumstances for their own situation.

After a late poker night my neighbor said to me, “ND, my marriage is very difficult. It’s been like this for a long time. I think we have lived apart. I guess I don’t love her anymore and she does not love me. I think we should separate.”
“The love feeling isn’t there anymore?” I asked.
“Yes!” he reaffirmed.
“What did you promise when you got married?” I asked.
“Did you promise to love her in good and bad times?”
“yes”
“Then love her,” I replied.
“But you don’t understand. The feeling is gone.”
“Than I guess this is a bad time. Love her! If the feeling isn’t there – that’s a good reason to love her even more.”
“But how do you love if you don’t
feel the love?”
My friend, love is a verb. Love—the feeling—is a fruit of love, the verb. So love her. Serve her. Sacrifice. Listen to her. Empathize. Appreciate. Affirm her. Are you willing to do that
?

Love is a verb even if some people make it a feeling.

Intense love does not measure, it just gives. Mother Teresa

We are not a product of our feelings. We are not driven by our feelings. If our feelings control our lives it’s because we given them control and empower them to do so.

Proactive people make love a verb.

Love is something you do, the sacrifices you make.
If you want to see love on full display, look at the people that have sacrificed for others, even for people that did not love in return.
As a parent I know that love is a value that is becoming alive through loving actions abuse of volume pills.
Proactive people subordinate feelings to values.

Love begins at home, and it is not how much we do… but how much love we put in that action. Mother Teresa

Love, the feeling, can be recaptured.

Question:

  • What are you doing to recapture that love feeling?

Related posts
3 Steps To Happiness
Live Your Dreams
Courage
Unique You

(Deutsch) 4 Schl

We are living in a world of individualists. Everyone is their own king and want’s to have it their way. We all long for independence and miss the quality of interdependence. San Francisco-45I will not go into that right now, but I want to focus on 4 simple factors that measure a great friendship. I know there is much more to a great friendship, but I would argue, that if one of these are missing, you will never have a GREAT FRIENDSHIP.

What does it take to build a great friendship?

4 Keys to build a great friendship

1. Time

As soon as you get to know someone you will only deepen a friendship if you spend time together. That does not mean you have to spend 5 hours a day hanging out. It means, you want to plan time of fellowship into your busy schedule. If someone has no time for me, I can be sure, that chances of building a great relationship will never happen. It’s the “I WANT” that matters.

Do you want to spend time to build a great friendship?

2. Commitment

Commitment comes into play when you find yourself spending time with someone. Commitment means you make a decision, not to talk bad behind your friends back. You commit to the friendship and to protect it.

Do you want to commit yourself to build a great friendship?

It is not so much our friends’ help that helps us, as the confidence of their help. Epicurus 

3. Love

Love grows! Love makes the friendship work. Love in a friendship means to accept them the way they are. You don’t and can’t change a person, but you can choose to love – no matter what. It’s my decision if I love my friend despite his deficit and defects. To love him in good and bad times.

Do you want to love to build a great friendship?

It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them. Ralph Waldo Emerson

4. Trust

Trust grows over time. Trust is fragile. But trust is the bond in a great friendship. Honesty will make a good friendship great. If you can say “I trust you”, than you know this friendship is great. If you have to guess if you can count on your friend in time of need. It’s not a great friendship. Trust can only be tested in a situation you have good reason to distrust. That’s what it’s all about.

Do you want to trust even if you have good reason not to?

The friend is the man who knows all about you, and still likes you. Elbert Hubbard

We all want a great friendship. 

The Question ist:
Am I ready to pay the price for a great friendship?
Am I a great friend for someone else?

Related posts
The 2am Friend
How To Gain Trust
How To Grow Mature

Helping Friends
Who Are Your Facebook Friends?

The 2am Friend

Beitrag auf Deutsch
I have many friends. At least that’s what my facebook tells me. But are these friends really my friends? What is a good friend? How do you define a very close friend?Zurich 08-5
Well, here are my thoughts about that.

Let’s call a very close friend the 2am friend.

The 2am friend…

  • You get encouraged when you are around him 
  • You expect his feedback to be honest and straight forward
  • You know that he loves you no matter what
  • You expect to keep everything private you tell him in private
  • You call at 2am and don’t feel like you are bothering him

If this is the 2am friend I don’t have many. Continue reading The 2am Friend